5 Surprising Truths About Choice That Will Redefine How You Decide

By Dr Joshua Kolawole, Global Transformational Leadership Trainer, Valdymas Intelligence LLC

Introduction: The Agony and Ecstasy of 35,000 Daily Choices

Imagine scrolling through an e-commerce platform to buy a new pair of running shoes, only to be bombarded with an endless array of minimalist styles, maximalist cushioning, and countless brands. Or think of the simple act of buying toothpaste, which has evolved from choosing between “mint or whitening” to navigating a wall of tubes promising 24-hour freshness, sensitivity relief, and a dozen other benefits. We live in a world overflowing with options, a stark contrast to the limited choices of the past.

While this abundance can be empowering, it can also be paralyzing. The average adult makes an estimated 30,000 to 35,000 conscious choices every single day. You feel like you are in the driver’s seat, yet many hidden forces and surprising truths shape your decisions without you even realizing it.

This article will explore five of the most impactful and counter-intuitive insights about the nature of choice. By understanding these hidden dynamics, you can begin to make more conscious, intentional, and transformative decisions that align with the life you truly want to live.

1. You’re Not Nearly as Rational as You Think

We like to believe that our choices are the product of careful, logical evaluation. However, research reveals that we are often “predictably irrational,” with our decisions heavily influenced by hidden cognitive biases that steer us in specific directions. As author Dan Ariely highlights, understanding these patterns is the first step toward regaining control over your own mind.

The Framing Effect: The way information is presented dramatically alters your perception and choices. For example, a medical procedure framed as having a 90% survival rate is far more appealing to you than one with a 10% mortality rate, even though they describe the exact same outcome. How a choice is framed can be more persuasive than the facts themselves.

The Decoy Effect: Your preference between two options can be manipulated by the introduction of a third, less attractive “decoy” option. Imagine buying popcorn at the movies. A small is $3 and a large is $7. You might choose the small. But if the theater adds a medium for $6.50, the large suddenly looks like a fantastic deal for only 50 cents more. The medium is the decoy—it exists only to make the large option more appealing by comparison, manipulating you into spending more than you originally intended.

Loss Aversion: You are wired to feel the pain of a loss more intensely than the pleasure of an equivalent gain. The prospect of losing $100 is a much stronger motivator for you than the possibility of gaining $100. This bias can lead to overly cautious, risk-averse behavior, causing you to miss out on significant potential gains simply to avoid the sting of a potential loss.

When you understand that these biases are constantly at play in your life—from consumer purchases to major life choices—you can learn to pause, question your initial impulses, and make decisions that are more aligned with your actual goals, not just your programmed reactions.

2. Your Perspective Isn’t Just a Point of View—It’s a Choice That Creates Your Reality

But if our subconscious is so easily tricked, where does our true power lie? It starts with the one thing you have absolute control over: your perspective. One of the most powerful choices you make has nothing to do with external options and everything to do with your internal framework. Your perspective is not a passive observation of the world; it is an active choice that defines your circumstances, shapes your actions, and ultimately creates your reality.

Consider the simple but profound analogy of a coffee shop. Is its purpose to be in the “coffee business serving people” or in the “people business serving coffee”? The first perspective is transactional, focused on product and efficiency. The second is relational, focused on experience, connection, and service. This subtle shift in perspective transforms everything—from customer loyalty and employee morale to your own personal fulfillment.

This principle is universal. It’s the difference between a college seeing itself as an “educational business training students” versus a “Mind Transforming Business building Meta-Leaders.” It’s the difference between your personal mindset of “we are poor and can’t do it” and one that says “we are rich and working towards getting it done.”

If you say you can or you cannot – you are right. – Henry Ford

By consciously choosing your perspective, you move from being a passive passenger in your life to becoming the active architect of your future.

3. The “Insignificant” Choices Are Weaving Your Destiny

Having claimed the power of your perspective, the next truth lies in appreciating the scale of every action you take. We often fixate on life’s monumental decisions, but the small, seemingly minor choices you make daily are quietly compounding to shape your destiny. This is the “Domino Effect,” where a single, tiny action can trigger a cascade of unforeseen and massive consequences.

An old proverb perfectly illustrates this concept: “For want of a nail, the shoe was lost. For want of a shoe, the horse was lost… until the kingdom was lost.”

This is a universal principle of consequence, echoed in timeless wisdom like “A stitch, in time, saves nine” and the “camel’s nose” metaphor, where letting one small, undesirable thing in opens the door for disaster. These powerful metaphors teach us several crucial lessons about our daily choices:

• Interconnectedness: Your decisions do not exist in a vacuum. One choice triggers a chain reaction, impacting other areas of your life in ways you may not immediately see.
• The Compounding Effect: The consequences of your choices accumulate over time. Skipping one workout may seem insignificant, but a consistent habit of making poor health choices will lead to significant problems. Likewise, your small, positive habits compound into remarkable achievements.
• Attention to Detail: The missing nail represents a small oversight with catastrophic results. Taking the time to handle minor details with care can prevent much larger problems for you in the future.

Every decision you make, no matter how small, is a thread in the tapestry of your life. These threads bind you to the outcomes you will one day face.

You are free to choose, but you are not free from the consequences of your choices. – R. Buckminster Fuller

4. There’s a Hidden Difference Between a “Choice” and a “Decision”

As you begin to honor the weight of your small actions, it becomes critical to understand the very nature of what you are doing. We often use the words “choice” and “decision” interchangeably, but there is a powerful distinction between them that can fundamentally reframe how you approach life’s crossroads.

• Decision: This is a process-oriented and often backward-looking act. It is the act of “making up one’s mind,” often by analyzing past data or weighing pros and cons to arrive at a conclusion.
• Choice: This is a value-oriented and forward-looking power. It is linked to your right and opportunity to select from possibilities based on your deepest aspirations, principles, and beliefs about the future you want to create.

This distinction is more than just semantics. When you face a major life crossroads, viewing it as a decision can feel analytical and detached. Viewing it as a choice, however, connects you to your core values and empowers you. A decision solves a problem; a choice shapes a future. Therefore, to make a decision is to manage a circumstance; to make a choice is to define your character.

5. True Transformation Isn’t About Changing—It’s About Choosing to Become

This brings us to the ultimate truth about your power to choose. It lies not in its ability to facilitate small adjustments, but in its capacity to fuel true transformation. There is a critical difference between the two: “Change means to alter the form or function of a thing; Transformation means for you to become something different with higher forms and function.”

Change is modifying what already exists. Transformation is a quantum leap into a new state of being. It’s a fundamental shift in mindset, capabilities, and the outcomes you generate. The source text offers a formal definition:

Transformation is a complete change in the quality of outcomes and standards of living of an individual and a people, that happens through well-defined processes which causes positive transitions and quantum leaps in the maturity of the minds of the people, their capabilities, the values they create, their uniqueness, and the noble impacts they make on their social systems, directly or indirectly.

A “transforming choice,” therefore, is not just a decision to do something different. It is a profound commitment to become someone different. It is a choice that sparks “quantum leaps in the maturity of your mind,” elevates your “uniqueness,” and allows you to make “noble impacts” on the world around you. It’s choosing to become a leader, an innovator, a healthier person, or a more compassionate individual at your core. This is the highest expression of choice: not just to alter your path, but to reinvent the traveler.

Conclusion: The Person You Decide to Be

Our journey has revealed that choice is not a single action, but a multi-layered process. It begins in the subconscious, where irrational biases pull your strings, is shaped by the conscious perspective you adopt as your lens, and is ultimately built by the compounding power of every small action you take. By understanding the profound difference between a decision and a choice, and between mere change and true transformation, you unlock a new level of agency over your life.

The path ahead is not predetermined. It is forged, moment by moment, by the choices you make.

The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

The real question is, what transforming choice will you make before you go to sleep tonight to begin becoming the person you know you can be?